The absence of information one contributes to a relationship is completely determined by personal comfort. This is not to say that the proclivity to share and, in turn, understand and support is nonexistent; just guarded. But, just as it is difficult for one to put themselves completely in a relationship because of past experiences, it is also just as difficult for one to not throw himself completely into something on the sheer fact that is who they are. As scary as exhaustive immersion may be, the fact that there is a shared love is incontestable. And if the love is there and mutual why is it such taboo to express?
Love is described as a sense of oneness, a deep ineffable feeling of affection and solicitude towards a person, such as that arising from kinship. In and of itself love is not scary but when whispered in the dark, shouted from a mountain, or proclaimed in a ceremony it elicits an emotion unlike any other known to mankind. But why? What is so unnerving at times about this little four letter word? I believe it lies in the confusion of loving and being in love.
To love someone is a beautiful thing. To be in love with someone is an ever-changing state that should be shared with few and admired by many. The fear should lie in the state of being in love because it’s ever changing, unexpected and confusing – that’s reason to be terrified. We are programmed to be apprehensive of the unknown. That’s what makes it intoxicating. It sometimes physically hurts because you yearn to figure it out. Never knowing what’s going to happen or what will make you fall more.
My plea is thus: do not fear l-o-v-e. I’m not asking you to use the word loosely and am certainly not undervaluing the power of the word, but don’t lock it away. Share your thoughts, hopes, dreams, and fears – all facets that make you who you are – and you will be showing true love for someone that you cherish. Keep them close to your heart, but, most importantly, tell them. Tell them everything. Tell them you love them. USE THE WORD. Believe in its power to heal. Leave the trepidation for falling in love where it belongs. For once you begin to fall it should never stop. But, alas, that resplendent episode is an entirely different colloquy.